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How to talk to your child about alcohol ages 6 to 8

explaining alcoholism to a child

That’s why it’s important for parents to help children build the confidence to make a healthy choice when someone offers tobacco, drugs, or alcohol. At Safe Harbor Recovery Center, we are happy to include children in family recovery activities to help them adjust and learn about what it means to be in recovery from addiction. If you believe that your drinking or drug use history should not be part https://rehabliving.net/ of the discussion, you can simply tell your child that you choose not to share it. Another approach is to admit that you did do some drinking as a teenager, but that it was a mistake—and give your teen an example of an embarrassing or painful moment that occurred because of your drinking. This approach may help your child better understand that youthful alcohol use does have negative consequences.

explaining alcoholism to a child

Their kids, however, may find relief knowing what may have contributed to some of the issues they may face today. Children tend to feel shame and guilt2 when they have a parent addicted to alcohol because they blame themselves for the parent’s alcohol use. It is important for adults to explain to children that their parent’s addiction is not their fault. Research2 with eco sober house ma children who have an alcoholic parent has suggested that children feel relief when adults approach them and offer to talk. You don’t have to force the discussion, but encouraging them to come to you if they’d like to speak lets them know they’re allowed to talk about their feelings. Kids say they use alcohol and other drugs to fit in with other kids.

Make the Most of Your Teen’s Visit to the Doctor (Ages 15 to 17 Years)

Even if your teen may have tried tobacco, alcohol, or drugs, you can still talk about making healthy choices and how to say “no” next time. What I didn’t know at the time was that there are a number of books available to help children of all ages wrap their heads around substance use disorder. Explaining addiction to children is a topic that many parents and grandparents find themselves exploring.

  • “At this age, if you tell them it’s bad, they think it’s bad,” says Paul Coleman, a father, family therapist, and author of How to Say It to Your Kids.
  • Living with an addicted parent is often chaotic, lonely, and even scary—especially if the family breaks up because of substance abuse.
  • Choose ideas you are comfortable with, and use your own style in carrying out the approaches you find useful.

Alcohol addiction treatment can be the first step in doing right by your children and family. Learn more about treatment and contact us today to get started. They may rationalize their behavior, make excuses, hide their drinking, or engage in other secretive or harmful behaviors. It’s never too late to start the conversation about avoiding drugs.

Parents Have a Significant Influence in Their Children’s Decisions to Experiment With Alcohol and Other Drugs

Just knowing that there are others who are feeling the same pain and confusion can be comforting to kids. It is also important to explain the symptoms of alcoholism to your child. You can tell them that people with this disease may have problems at work or school, they may lose friends, and they may end up in jail. People with alcoholism also have a higher risk of developing other health problems, such as liver disease and cancer. Parents struggling with alcoholism (which experts call “alcohol use disorder” or AUD) may be surprised or concerned to learn about the affect their drinking can have on their children now and through adulthood.

He has a nursing and business/technology degrees from The Johns Hopkins University. Some research has found an association between parents’ use of alcohol and teens’ lower performance in school. This could be related in part to the behavior issues seen among children of parents with an AUD. Unfortunately, the effects of growing up around alcohol use are sometimes so profound that they last a lifetime. Living with a parent who has an alcohol use disorder affects the way kids, and kids-turned-adults, see themselves.

  • Generally, your child will be more open to your supervision if he or she feels you are keeping tabs because you care, not because you distrust him or her.
  • Watching such a commercial with your child can be an opportunity to discuss the many ways that alcohol can affect people—in some cases bringing on feelings of sadness or anger rather than carefree high spirits.
  • As an adult, you may have a beer or glass of wine on occasion, and that’s okay.
  • By setting the drinking age at 21, they hope older people will be able to make good decisions about alcohol.
  • Hopefully, you now have a head start on how to explain alcohol to a child and will be prepared to prevent underage drinking in your household.

It can be frustrating to learn that someone can’t control their alcohol use. If you’re wondering “does my daughter have an alcohol problem” or “does my son have an alcohol problem,” keep in mind that only doctors or licensed addiction professionals can diagnose someone with AUD. Under the Affordable Care Act, insurance plans must cover drug and alcohol assessments for teens. Depending on your insurance plan, your child may be able to get an assessment at no cost to you. And check out these strategies to help you talk with your kids about staying healthy and drug free.

How to Help a Child Who Drinks Too Much Alcohol

Other sources of information and guidance may be found in your local Yellow Pages under “Alcoholism” or through one of the resources listed at the end of this booklet. If your child’s friends use alcohol, your child is more likely to drink too. So it makes sense to try to encourage your young teen to develop friendships with kids who do not drink and who are otherwise healthy influences on your child. A good first step is to simply get to know your child’s friends better. You can then invite the kids you feel good about to family get-togethers and outings and find other ways to encourage your child to spend time with those teens. Also, talk directly with your child about the qualities in a friend that really count, such as trustworthiness and kindness, rather than popularity or a “cool” style.

explaining alcoholism to a child

If your family is affected by alcohol use, it is important to seek help. It’s important to be honest with children, but how you explain a parent’s alcohol addiction will vary depending on the child’s age. For example, teenagers are likely to understand their parent has an alcohol addiction.

Talk to Your Kids About Sex and Healthy Relationships

Do your best to make it a 2-way conversation — ask your child what they’re thinking and if they have any questions for you. Talk to your pediatrician if you’d like more tips for telling your child about your past drug use. If you don’t talk about it, your child may think it’s okay to use alcohol and other drugs. Make sure your child knows right from the start that you think it’s important to stay safe and avoid drugs. Talk to your child about the dangers of tobacco, alcohol, and drugs. After hearing her grandma’s stories, my daughter, who was only 5 years old at the time, wanted to know why her grandpa died so young.

The pledge program helps parents and teens work together to keep kids safe. Parents promise to set a healthy example regarding alcohol and teens promise to play it safe when it comes to underage drinking. Children living in homes where there is parental substance abuse can find life difficult, unpredictable, and confusing. Sometimes they even believe the alcohol or drug abuse is their fault. Dealing with this chaos and unpredictability can leave kids feeling insecure and uncertain. Additionally, they may receive inconsistent messages from their parents.

Talking to Your Kids About Alcohol

At this age, it’s tempting for them to piece together what they do know and try to come up with their own explanations. Reassure them that their parent loves them, but that they have a disease and need help. Also, remind them that you love them and are there to support them. By Buddy T

Buddy T is a writer and founding member of the Online Al-Anon Outreach Committee with decades of experience writing about alcoholism. Because he is a member of a support group that stresses the importance of anonymity at the public level, he does not use his photograph or his real name on this website.

Focusing on the love of your children and how your drinking may be affecting them can go a long way toward motivating you to scale back your drinking or stop it altogether. And research shows that when parents reduce alcohol use, especially when children are very young, children do better. Children of parents who use alcohol are at higher risk for anxiety, depression, and unexplained physical symptoms (internalizing behaviors). They are also more likely to display rule-breaking, aggressiveness, and impulsivity (externalizing behaviors) in childhood. Perhaps to avoid criticism or the anger of their parent with AUD, many children become super responsible or perfectionists, and can become overachievers or workaholics.

In group meetings, participants can share their experiences in a non-judgmental setting and begin to heal from the trauma of growing up in a home with an addicted parent. If you have an adult child who is struggling with their alcohol use, it’s natural to be concerned and to want to help. You might feel angry or confused and you might not know where to turn. If you’re worried about how to help, you should know that you’re not alone.

Then choose a time to talk when both you and your child have some “down time” and are feeling relaxed. Children from homes where there is parental substance abuse are often scared, lonely, and many times, feel isolated from society. Be sure you’re talking to them about what they’re experiencing. And whether you deliver the message perfectly or not, just giving them someone they can talk to is an important step in their recovery.

Help yours work through different situations so they’re ready. What can they say at a party when someone offers them a drink? Brainstorm together and let your teen know they can always call or text you and you will pick them up with no lecturing or punishment. Even if you’re not talking about their parent’s addiction, kids still know it exists. Plus, covering it up or pretending that it’s not a big deal doesn’t protect them from the pain that the addiction causes them.